My life in high school was one of the greatest not only was it about books but more of adventure. Basketball and table tennis tournaments during the first and second term, music festivals in the second term, writing letters to boys, the ranger’s commander, symposiums, entertainment days, trips, prefect not forgetting the other harsh side; punishments and strikes. That made our high school days thrilling. My parents did not really have it hard raising me up in this stage apart from, I was big headed always wanting to do things my way and very rude. (Hehehe yes I was do not be shocked)
21st century; drugs, alcohol, sex, pornography is what defines their thrill. This comes as a wake up call when a number of students were caught in a bus smoking bhang and having sex a week ago. That was how they decided to kick start their August holiday with adventures that made them sleep in the police cell with one been apprehended in court for having smuggled bhang on her private part!
Teenage hood is one stage that ruins or builds teenagers. Peer pressure been their director, it is the high time parents embrace new parenting techniques. Gone are the days when you would spank your child, tell them not to have a boyfriend, keep them in closed doors…what am I saying. The traditional way will not work. Or does it still work???
This is that stage when the hormones are on cloud nine, they are eager to know that which you prevent them from, experiment and be their own bosses. It is as if they are competing for who gets to do what first. Harshness leads to enmity with your child and woe unto you since you will never come to know what they up to. This is what that child wants to hear or be done by you and maybe the mayhem we witnessing shall not crop up.
Create a friendly environment where the teenager shall always have a one on one conversation with you at all time. That fierce, serious face freaks them therefore finding a confidant in their fellow teenage friends who mislead them.
Have the sex talk. Many parents fear having this topic discussed forgetting that their bodies are changing. Of course they want to know about this magnetic fusion, how that thirst can be quenched…yes they are horny but let them know the implications like teen pregnancy which is on the rise, STIs, HIV/AIDS and how that can change their life. If they have a boy/girlfriend invite them over, get to know the basis of the relationship and counsel them appropriately.
The character of a teen can be well described by the kind of friends they hang out with. Positive and negative influencers surround them. Before you judge the type they should or should not hang around with, get to know these individuals then from there you are able to answer your child’s (why) questions.
Having fun together creates an unbreakable bond. Reasons why teens skive when you are not around is to have adventure and break the boredom. The holiday is here, why you don’t go to the beach, an outdoor event like a family camp, grab that ice cream, let them shop for that fashion they ogle on, go to the coffee house or have pizza. While on it, let them see that liquor and drugs are not the A thing.
Partying when on holidays in another factor that a teen plans for. This can be from sleepovers, camping, birthday parties, and concerts. There are those that have are meant to build them like teen concerts while others to destroy them. Parents can arrange for a sleepover where if it is only boys or girls an adult is in the look out to watch after them. This can also be an avenue to teach them life basic lessons.
Life is not just about books and that we know too well. Talents, hobbies bring the best in us. Supporting your child’s talents makes them go a notch higher since they know you have their back. They want to sing, write, play the guitar, draw, play soccer, dance, act do not bar them. Instead, if you know a tutor hire them and help your teen’s talent.
Watch a movie with them and this way you are able to monitor what content they watch. This is way hilarious since we living in a digitized era where laptops, desktop, tablets and smart phones are in the capable hands of our children where mother nature only knows what they see. If they watching pornography, advice and counsel them before they turn into addicts and restrict use of gadgets when not around by locking them up.
Boundaries are really important especially when the child keeps repeating same mistakes. This is because you as a parent has not set the boundary and the teen knows very well no action will be taken. All talk and no action is dead. Let them know what happens when they sneak, misbehave around. If you have internet connections in the house, try and block those nasty sites.
The reason as to why they in high school is to make a future and be that person they want to be. This can only be achieved by creating a vision together. Improvement in subjects is key and so is scoring the right grades. Keep on reminding them on who they want to be and why it is necessary to work hard.
It is said prayers do move mountains. Only a prayerful parent can make the Almighty shield their children and make them change for the best. Trust, believe and be patient.
Happy holiday as you try to parent your teenager.